The story below was in today's Daily Monitor: My concerns are just how I think story might not have been written.
Search for a magazine model:
In partnership with African Woman, sherry V&A, at a cocktail last Friday held at Serena Hotel in Katongole Hall, unveiled plans to have a countrywide search for a cover girl, V&A Covergal, that will be glammed up to appear on the cover of the magazine of May.{First of all Serena has no Katongole Hall, its Katonga Hall! And how about a girl who "will be glammed up to appear on the cover of the magazine of May"? Who taught this motherf****r English?} Roberty Kalumba, you are an idiot!They need an ordinary girl to grace the cover the May edition of African Woman. “She doesn’t have to be a model, celebrity, a known personality or socialite,” was the criteria as laid down by the head honcho of the magazine Sylvia Owori.
According to the UBL Brand Manger, Spirits Phoebe Nakabazzi, the search for the cover girl will be country-wide and the successful lady will embody the qualities of V&A “that are independence, confidence and elegance,” she said. What one needs to do should they want to participate is to purchase V&A at the participating stores; Uchumi and Capital Shoppers and fill out a necktie coupon to enter the draw which will take place each week until 200 girls are selected to proceed to the next stage where the contest will begin. {Ok does the Brand have a manger in which is it is kept until it grows up? or did they mean to say Brand Manager? }
The 200 will later be reduced to 30 girls who will face a public vote through the different forms of media- radio, TV and print, where the public will do the sieving. There will be a final event that will end the whole process. “It will be a big production that will give us who the final girl will be,” said Owori.
Apart from being the Cover Girl, the winner will stand to win goodies from Sylvia Owori’s wardrobe and a Shs2m shopping voucher from one of the best boutiques in the country. {Like her personal wardrobe? Really? and the best boutique in the country? isn't that Sylvia's too? So they'll walk away with her personal clothing as well as items from her shop?!}
Consumers of V&A will also stand a chance to win various instant prizes at participating stores through the lucky-dip promotions that will include a dinner for two at a top hotel, spa treatments, salon and tickets to the cinema. The search has began.{The lucky dip promotions will include a dinner for two? or the lucky dip prizes will include dinner for two, salon treatments, etc?}
beef??? I get your problems. I advise you to read the WOrkZIne for properly edited work
ReplyDeleteThis is the problem with PR stories, you of all people should know this. They get some reporter to write something he dont and will never give a shit about and Voila!...here is your story!! and yes, I have told Robert about this rant...he will appreciate this!
ReplyDelete@workzine: i have read your stuff, if i send you edits, you'll just curve your tongue.
ReplyDelete@Liz: Here is what i think, anything going to be written in your name, should be edited or at least proven to be true by the guy whose by-line is going on it. Period. Well he can or not appreciate this.
Tell Robert that he doesn't have the right to do this to us. I mean, downloading shit from the internet and pasting it in the paper is one thing, writing rubbish is another.
Ok, now I give up. Those guys need therapy.
ReplyDeleteHowever, I won't get carried away coz I stay in a glass house and cannot afford to throw stones.
It may be me next time.
Ed**
Ok Edna,
ReplyDeletesurprisingly your paper has less grammatical errors than these chaps and yet with an even probably less experienced team.
Robert Kalumba is a good professional writer, we all know how typo errors and spelling mistakes can change meanings to something completely different, which becomes confusing to a reader. Robert is no idiot, i think that was rude of u to say that. If the proof reader or editor didn't check the article before going to print, that was bad. I agree there is no Katongole Hall but c'mon, this guy (Robert) is better than those "writers" who said 'V&A has partnered with a PROMINENT magazine in Uganda...blah..blah..blah as if they couldn't just say 'African Woman magazine'. This was ridiculous really. But cut Robert some slack, out of all the other newspapers, he wrote the best article, at least, in comparison. Cheers.
ReplyDeleteHi Anonymous, clearly you haven't been following the Daily Monitor onslaught that's shed blood on this here blog lately. My response:
ReplyDelete1) It was wrong for Robert to put his name to anything that was not spell-checked by himself. No one who rights out of passion does those things. Its slatternly and unpolished.
2) Has Robert never been to Serena? Or does he not know Katonga Hall? Was he at the function?
3) Robert was not much of a writer either before or after his sojourn abroad; improving one's vocabulary cache from 2,000 to 2,300 doesn't count as qualification for a professional writer. And downloaded articles are not a justification for religious variety. Find Devapriyo Das of the Observer and talk to him.
4) Ergo I put it to you that the proof reader did go this article, and the editor probably had a glance at it too. They did what was within human possibility to save the thing but as they say "you don't all of them all the time." I shudder to think if the proof reader had actually not checked the article what we would have read.
5) The Coup de Grace: when you build a reputation of plagiarizing (read copying and pasting) from the internet where people actually invest time and effort in delivering world class writing, and hence produce almost impeccable work in your name(even though its actually not your work), you gain a reputation. The landscape around you morphs to accommodate your erstwhile latent skills and raises the bar. The problem though is that the day you have to actually write something from your limited word arsenal (hehe! the pun is that Robert supports Arsenal - or he should), you'll end in this sticky murk from which you are now trying to anonymously extricate yourself.